# Αγγλικά λογοπαίγνια – English puns



## Zazula (Jun 29, 2012)

Ξεκαρδιστικά λογοπαίγνια στ' αγγλικά που τα βρήκα στο *punoftheday.com* — τα πιάνετε όλα; :)

1. I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me. 
2. Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now. 
3. I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.
4. It's not that the man did not know how to juggle, he just didn't have the balls to do it.
5. Smaller babies may be delivered by stork but the heavier ones need a crane.
6. I couldn't quite remember how to throw a boomerang, but eventually it came back to me.
7. I used to have a fear of hurdles, but I got over it.
8. Einstein developed a theory about space, and it was about time too.
9. There was a sign on the lawn at a drug re-hab center that said 'Keep off the Grass'.
10. I was going to look for my missing watch, but I could never find the time.
11. Police were called to a daycare where a three-year-old was resisting a rest. 
12. Atheism is a non-prophet organization. 
13. He drove his expensive car into a tree and found out how the Mercedes bends. 
14. Sleeping comes so naturally to me, I could do it with my eyes closed.
15. When William joined the army he disliked the phrase 'fire at will'. 
16. I'm not a big fan of archery. It has too many drawbacks.
17. Mummies are bound to be uptight.
18. To write with a broken pencil is pointless. 
19. A new type of broom came out, it is sweeping the nation. 
20. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.
21. Need an ark to save two of every animal? I noah guy. 
22. Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I'll show you A-flat minor. 
23. I used to be addicted to soap, but I'm clean now. 
24. Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda? He was lucky it was a soft drink. 
25. A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was a nurse said 'No change yet'.
.
26. Atheists don't solve exponential equations because they don't believe in higher powers.
27. My new theory on inertia doesn't seem to be gaining momentum.
28. A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is two-tired.
29. There was once a cross-eyed teacher who couldn't control his pupils. 
30. I did a theatrical performance about puns. Really it was just a play on words.
31. I relish the fact that you've mustard the strength to ketchup to me. 
32. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana. 
33. Some people's noses and feet are built backwards: their feet smell and their noses run. 
34. A prisoner's favorite punctuation mark is the period. It marks the end of his sentence. 
35. The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
36. The butcher backed up into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work. 
37. Don't trust people that do acupuncture, they're back stabbers.
38. What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing - but it let out a little whine. 
39. I was going to buy a book on phobias, but I was afraid it wouldn't help me.
40. The dead batteries were given out free of charge.
41. Pencil sharpeners have a tough life - they live off tips.
42. I wanted to lose weight so I went to the paint store. I heard I could get thinner there.
43. Two peanuts were walking in a tough neighborhood and one of them was a-salted. 
44. When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds. 
45. Pencils could be made with erasers at both ends, but what would be the point?
46. If you don't pay your exorcist you get repossessed. 
47. You know prices are rising when you buy a winter jacket and even down is up.
48. Lightning sometimes shocks people because it just doesn't know how to conduct itself.
49. A hungry traveller stops at a monastery and is taken to the kitchens. A brother is frying chips. 'Are you the friar?' he asks. 'No. I'm the chip monk,' he replies.
50. The roundest knight at king Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference.
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51. A rule of grammar: double negatives are a no-no.
52. Why did the capacitor kiss the diode? He just couldn't resistor.
53. What's the definition of a will? (It's a dead giveaway). 
54. When the cannibal showed up late to the luncheon, they gave him the cold shoulder. 
55. It's raining cats and dogs. Well, as long as it doesn't reindeer.
56. She got fired from the hot dog stand for putting her hair in a bun.
57. What is the difference between a nicely dressed man on a tricycle and a poorly dressed man on a bicycle? A tire.
58. John Deere's manure spreader is the only equipment the company won't stand behind.
59. Yesterday I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. The doctor says I'm OK, but I feel like I've dyed a little inside.
60. If you step onto a plane and recognize a friend of yours named Jack don't yell out Hi Jack!
61. The one who invented the door knocker got a No-bell prize. 
62. My job at the concrete plant seems to get harder and harder.
63. It was an emotional wedding. Even the cake was in tiers. 
64. I like European food so I decided to Russia over there because I was Hungary. After Czech'ing the menu I ordered Turkey. When I was Finnished I told the waiter 'Spain good but there is Norway I could eat another bite'. 
65. Did you hear about these new reversible jackets? I'm excited to see how they turn out.
66. I've been to the dentist several times so I know the drill.
67. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart. 
68. A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat. 
69. I was arrested after my therapist suggested I take something for my kleptomania.
70. The magician got so mad he pulled his hare out.
71. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat says to the other, 'You stay here, I'll go on a head.'. 
72. The coffee tasted like mud because it was ground a couple of minutes ago.
73. I should have been sad when my flashlight batteries died, but I was delighted.
74. I saw a beaver movie last night, it was the best dam movie I've ever seen.
75. Alcohol and calculus don't mix so don't drink and derive.
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76. To some - marriage is a word ... to others - a sentence.
77. Those who jump off a Paris bridge are in Seine. 
78. The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large. 
79. I get my large circumference from too much pi.
80. The new weed whacker is cutting-hedge technology.
81. I'm inclined to be laid back.
82. The frustrated cannibal threw up his hands. 
83. If you leave alphabet soup on the stove and go out, it could spell disaster. 
84. I could not pull out of my parking space, so I used my back up plan.
85. It is tough to do inventories in Afghanistan because of the tally ban.
86. Greengrocers earn a meager celery, come home beet and just want to read the pepper, take a leek, turnip the covers endive into bed.
87. Cartoonist found dead in home. Details are sketchy. 
88. The two guys caught drinking battery acid will soon be charged. 
89. Did you hear about the fire at the circus? The heat was in tents. 
90. A criminal's best asset is his lie ability.
91. England doesn't have a kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool 
92. When the TV repairman got married the reception was excellent. 
93. He said I was average - but he was just being mean. 
94. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie. 
95. A noun and a verb were dating but they broke up because the noun was too possessive. 
96. Deafness is getting to be quite a problem for me lately. I never thought I'd hear myself say that.
97. He didn't tell his mother that he ate some glue. His lips were sealed. 
98. When Peter Pan punches, they Neverland.
99. The shareholders of a compass manufacturer were concerned that the company wasn't heading in the right direction.
100. The indecisive rower couldn't choose either oar.
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101. Tennis players don't marry because Love means Nothing to them. 
102. She's happy to make a pair of pants for you, or at least sew its seams.
103. Old doctors never die they just lose their patience. 
104. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was ticketed for littering. 
105. A cardboard belt would be a waist of paper. 
106. The book of incantations was useless. The author had failed to run a spell check.
107. A baker stopped making donuts after he got tired of the hole thing. 
108. I finished my trigonometry exam without a secant to lose.
109. I really do have a photographic memory -- I just haven't developed it yet. 
110. Let's talk about rights and lefts. You're right so I left.
111. Never invest in funerals, it's a dying industry.
112. It's better to love a short girl than not a tall. 
113. The trailer for the movie was produced without a hitch!
114. I decided that becoming a vegetarian was a missed steak.
115. I used to be a watchmaker. It was a great job and I made my own hours.
116. Now matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.
117. I met a girl at an internet cafe, but we didn't click.
118. I didn't want to buy leather shoes, but eventually I was suede.
119. When an actress saw her first strands of gray hair she thought she'd dye. 
120. The best way to communicate with a fish is to drop them a line.
121. For plumbers, a flush beats a full house. 
122. I used to be a tap dancer until I fell in the sink. 
123. Have you heard about that online origami store? It folded.
124. A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months. 
125. The proctologist reassured the patient that his condition could be rectified.
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126. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption. 
127. My student was late for class, claiming he was in the washroom. I think he was stalling.
128. All the waterfowl kept their eyes closed except for one. He was a Peking Duck. 
129. The lights were too bright at the Chinese restaurant so the manager decided to dim sum.
130. Math teachers have lots of problems.
131. For a while, Houdini used a lot of trap doors in his act, but he was just going through a stage.
132. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion. 
133. In high school I recall having a beautiful but difficult math teacher. She was easy on the eyes and hard on the pupils!
134. Stealing someone's coffee is called 'mugging'. 
135. A handlebar mustache may look ridiculous, but symmetrical eyelashes are even cilia.
136. Although Nobelists tend to have dynamite personalities, Niels was a Bohr, and Linus was a Pauling.
137. Calves take well to bottle feeding because one nipple is as good as an udder.
138. Novice pirates make terrible singers because they can't hit the high seas.
139. We were so poor when I was growing up we couldn't even afford to pay attention. 
140. When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U C L A.
141. Experts say the cost of funerals have risen by 50%, they blame it on the cost of living.
142. The little old woman who lived in a shoe wasn't the sole owner - there were strings attached.
143. 5000 hares have escaped from the zoo. The police are combing the area.
144. If you need something done, call an electrician - they conduit.
145. I don't think I need a spine. It's holding me back. 
146. I once thought about cloning a new, more efficient brain, but then I realized that I was getting a head of myself.
147. In the room the curtains were drawn, but the rest of the furniture was real.
148. Every calendar's days are numbered. 
149. I hate the price of candy at the movie theater. They're always raisinette.
150. How do you make antifreeze? Steal her blanket.
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151. If you wear a blindfold at the shooting range, you won't know what you're missing.
152. An electrician is a bright spark who knows what's watt.
153. Seven days without a pun makes one weak. 
154. My wife tells me I'm a skeptic - but I don't believe a word she says. 
155. Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end. 
156. I'm bad at math, so the equation 2n+2n is 4n to me.
157. Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses. 
158. Somebody was running a flea circus, but a dog came and stole the show. 
159. Once you've seen one shopping center you've seen a mall. 
160. Bugs have very diverse religious views, because they are all in sects.
161. I used to be a banker but I lost interest 
162. The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered. 
163. If a judge loves the sound of his own voice, expect a long sentence. 
164. Never lie to an x-ray technician. They can see right through you. 
165. There was a fight in the candy store. Two suckers got licked. 
166. He avoided funerals because he was not a mourning person. 
167. Puns about monorails always make for decent one-liners.
168. In democracy its your vote that counts. In feudalism its your count that votes. 
169. Optometrists live long because they dilate.
170. When the electricity went off during a storm at a school the students were de-lighted.
171. A bacteria walked into a bar and the bartender said, 'We don't serve bacteria in this place.' The bacteria said, 'But I work here, I'm staph.'
172. What did the triangle say to the circle? You're so pointless. 
173. He wears glasses during math because it improves divison. 
174. When the shocked IRS agent was found guilty of tax evasion he had to take time to collect himself.
175. I dropped out of my communism class because of lousy Marx.
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176. Organ donors put their heart into it.
177. Biologists have recently produced immortal frogs by removing their vocal cords. They can't croak. 
178. In a recession, the most secure job is garbage-man. Business is always picking up.
179. We never got the tent up because of all the missed stakes we had.
180. As the shoe said to the hat, 'You go on ahead, and I'll follow on foot'.
181. An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either. 
182. He had a photographic memory that was never developed. 
183. The cannibal's cookbook titled 'How to Better Serve your Fellow Man' was written by a guy who had a wife and ate kids. 
184. The cowboy that got fired from his ranch job wasn't crazy, he was just deranged.
185. I used to do rock climbing as a youth, but I was much boulder back then.
186. When asked by a passenger how high he would get, the pilot replied,'I don't do drugs.' 
187. A toothless termite walked into a tavern and said, "Is the bar tender here?" 
188. Old colanders never die, they just can't take the strain anymore.
189. If you are among the cream of dairy inspectors, nothing cheesy gets pasteurize.
190. Benny was sure that if he had to he could master braille once he got a feel for it.
191. I tried wrapping Christmas presents, but I didn't have the gift. 
192. Don't join dangerous cults: Practice safe sects!
193. My friend dropped his box of Italian pastries on the floor. I cannoli imagine what he must be going through.
194. She had a boyfriend with a wooden leg, but broke it off. 
195. It wasn't school John disliked it was just the principal of it. 
196. If you invite an insomniac to your pajama party they will be up for it.
197. Women who wear $200.00 perfume obviously are known to have no common scents.
198. It's true I don't like soap, but you don't have to rub it in my face! 
199. Those who throw dirt are sure to lose ground. 
200. I didn't understand the math, so the teacher summed it up for me.


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## azimuthios (Jun 29, 2012)

Δεν τα διάβασα όλα, αλλά ευχαριστώ Ζαζ. Όσα διάβασα είναι σπουδαία και ξεκαρδιστικά. :)


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## Palavra (Jun 29, 2012)

Αυτό, όχι:
2. Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now. 
...δεν τα διάβασα όλα ακόμα :)


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## Zazula (Jun 29, 2012)

Εγώ έχω λιώσει όλη τη μέρα διαβάζοντάς τα.

Παλ Αύρα: all right (αφού μόνο η δεξιά πλευρά τού 'χει μείνει πλέον) και all right = OK. ;)


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## azimuthios (Jun 29, 2012)

Αφού του κόπηκε η αριστερή πλευρά τώρα είναι μόνο δεξιά (all *right*), Παλ... :)


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## Zazula (Jun 29, 2012)

There was a man who entered a local newspaper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win. Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.


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## azimuthios (Jun 29, 2012)

Θα είχε ενδιαφέρον τώρα που τα διαβάζω με προσοχή, να προσπαθήσουμε σαν άσκηση να τα μεταφράσουμε κιόλας, για να δούμε τι μπορούμε να πετύχουμε. :)


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## Zazula (Jun 29, 2012)

Δεν τόλμησα να το προτείνω εξαρχής, διότι αντιλαμβάνομαι το πόσο δύσκολο είναι. Ωστόσο ήμουν βέβαιος πως κάθε μεταφραστής που 'χει φάει γερή πετριά, την ώρα που θα διάβαζε το κάθε λογοπαίγνιο θα προβληματιζόταν και σχετικά με τη μεταφραστική απόδοσή του. :)


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## nickel (Jun 29, 2012)

Καλημέρα. Για να μη λιώσω σαν τον Ζάζουλα, τα λογοπαίγνια κιντλεροποιήθηκαν και η απόλαυσή τους θα γίνει στον σωστό τόπο και χρόνο. 

Μπαίνω, βέβαια, σ' έναν πειρασμό, να ζητάμε από τα νέα μέλη να μεταφράζουν κι από ένα λογοπαίγνιο.

Προς το παρόν, θα ανέβω ένα σκαλί ακόμα και θα αναφέρω (για δεύτερη φορά) τους τομσουιφτισμούς, Tom Swifties:

A Tom Swifty (or Tom Swiftie) is a phrase in which a quoted sentence is linked by a pun to the manner in which it is attributed.

Τα παραδείγματα είναι της Wikipedia:


 "I'll have a martini," said Tom dryly.
 "Who left the toilet seat down?" Tom asked peevishly.
 "Pass me the shellfish," said Tom crabbily.
 "That's the last time I'll stick my arm in a lion's mouth," the lion-tamer said off-handedly.
 "Can I go looking for the Grail again?" Tom requested.
 "I unclogged the drain with a vacuum cleaner," said Tom succinctly.
 "I might as well be dead," Tom croaked.
 "We just struck oil!" Tom gushed.
 "It's freezing," Tom muttered icily.
 "They had to amputate them both at the ankles," said Tom defeatedly.
 "Who discovered radium?" asked Marie curiously.
 "The Battle of the Nile? A lot of fun!" said Lord Nelson disarmingly.
 "Hurry up and get to the back of the ship," Tom said sternly.
 "Is there a number between seven and nine?" Tom asked considerately.
 "We could have made a fortune canning pineapples" Tom groaned dolefully.
The standard syntax is for the quoted sentence to be first, followed by the description of the act of speaking. The hypothetical speaker is usually, by convention, called "Tom" (or "he" or "she"), unless some other name is needed for the pun (as in the Marie Curie and Lord Nelson examples above). 

Στο επόμενο μήνυμα θα πιάσουμε τα cryptic clues των σταυρολέξων.


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## drsiebenmal (Jun 29, 2012)

Χμμ, κάτι σε _"a Nickel for your puns", he worded lexically_ εμπίπτει στον ορισμό;


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## azimuthios (Jun 29, 2012)

Το 111 και το 124 είναι από τα πιο εύκολα για παράδειγμα, γιατί είναι φράσεις που τις χρησιμοποιούμε και στα ελληνικά. 

124: Ο κλέφτης ενός ημερολογίου, έφαγε δώδεκα μήνες. (ένα πρόχειρο παράδειγμα)
111: Ποτέ μην επενδύεις σε γραφεία κηδειών. Είναι ένα νεκρό επάγγελμα. (ένα δεύτερο πρόχειρο παράδειγμα) 

Δύσκολα είναι τα 110 και 112 για παράδειγμα, γιατί παίζουν και με τους ήχους και την αμφισημία των λέξεων.


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## Zazula (Jun 29, 2012)

azimuthios said:


> 111: Ποτέ μην επενδύεις σε γραφεία κηδειών. Είναι ένα νεκρό επάγγελμα. (ένα δεύτερο πρόχειρο παράδειγμα)


Οι νεκροθάφτες ανέκαθεν μας ενέπνεαν: http://lexilogia.gr/forum/showthread.php?4243-%CE%95%CF%80%CE%B1%CE%B3%CE%B3%CE%B5%CE%BB%CE%BC%CE%B1%CF%84%CE%B9%CE%BA%CE%AD%CF%82-%CE%B1%CF%80%CE%B1%CE%BD%CF%84%CE%AE%CF%83%CE%B5%CE%B9%CF%82-%CF%83%CF%84%CE%BF-%CE%A0%CF%8E%CF%82-%CF%80%CE%AC%CE%B5%CE%B9-%CE%B7-%CE%B4%CE%BF%CF%85%CE%BB%CE%B5%CE%B9%CE%AC


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## Zazula (Jun 29, 2012)

nickel said:


> Προς το παρόν, θα ανέβω ένα σκαλί ακόμα και θα αναφέρω (για δεύτερη φορά) τους τομσουιφτισμούς, Tom Swifties:


Τώρα αν σου πω πως οι τομσουιφτισμοί δεν με διασκεδάζουν ούτε στο μισό απ' ό,τι τα αρχικά λογοπαίγνια, σημαίνει πως τη σκάλα τη σχεδίασε ο Έσερ;


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## nickel (Jun 29, 2012)

Zazula said:


> Τώρα αν σου πω πως οι τομσουιφτισμοί δεν με διασκεδάζουν ούτε στο μισό απ' ό,τι τα αρχικά λογοπαίγνια, σημαίνει πως τη σκάλα τη σχεδίασε ο Έσερ;


«Δεν θα το κάνω ανατολικό ζήτημα», είπε ο Νικέλ αφοπλιστικά.


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## Zazula (Jun 29, 2012)

nickel said:


> «Δεν θα το κάνω ανατολικό ζήτημα», είπε ο Νικέλ αφοπλιστικά.


Η σιωπή μου διά τυρρηνικής σάλπιγγος προς απάντησή σου.

Τέλος πάντων, σκεφτόμουν τώρα δα ένα λογοπαίγνιο στα ελληνικά — για πείτε μου αν είναι καλό:
Ο Κινέζος έμπορος που πρωτόφερε τα GPS στην Ελλάδα είπε: «Σαφέστατα πλοηγούμαστε του ανταγωνισμού.»


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## nickel (Jun 29, 2012)

Το καλό λογοπαίγνιο φαίνεται όταν οι τρεις στους τέσσερις το προσπεράσουν χωρίς να καταλάβουν ότι είναι λογοπαίγνιο. Ίσως θα το καταλάβουν όταν δουν τον έναν στους τέσσερις να γελάει και αναρωτηθούν.

Το λογοπαίγνιο που εξαναγκάζει το γέλιο σου είναι το επιθεωρησιακό. Στην επιθεώρηση δεν μπορεί να το αμολάει και να κάθεται να κοιτάει γύρω γύρω ποιος θα γελάσει — αν και μερικές φορές το κάνουν κι αυτό.


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## Zazula (Jun 29, 2012)

Έχεις αναρωτηθεί για το ενδεχόμενο να σκέφτεσαι διπολικά;  Δηλαδή ή θα έχουμε επιθεωρησιακό λογοπαίγνιο ή αδιαφανές για την πλειονότητα; Μόνο άκρα;


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## nickel (Jun 29, 2012)

Zazula said:


> Έχεις αναρωτηθεί για το ενδεχόμενο να σκέφτεσαι διπολικά;  Δηλαδή ή θα έχουμε επιθεωρησιακό λογοπαίγνιο ή αδιαφανές για την πλειονότητα; Μόνο άκρα;



Δεν σκεφτόμουν διπολικά. Αλλά, δυστυχώς, κατέθεσα διπολικά. Ε, τι θες τώρα, να περιγράψω το φάσμα του γκρίζου στο πεδίο του λογοπαίγνιου; :)


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## bernardina (Jun 29, 2012)

Μπήκα το πρωί, έριξα μια ματιά στα πάνω πάνω --η πρώτη μου αντίδραση: αμάν και να μου ζητούσαν να τα μεταφράσω! 
 (η γνωστή πετριά, γιου νόου...)
Άφησα τα υπόλοιπα για αργότερα, όταν δεν θα με ζουπάει αγρίως το πλάνο της ημέρας. Πάντως όσα πρόλαβα να δω είναι εξαιρετικά.


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## daeman (Jun 29, 2012)

...
 By my rules, Zaz rules! :upz:
I'm always panting for puns, but it seems I came panting and blowing to this thread. 

Για σεφτέ, δυο τρία που πήρε το μάτι μου στα γρήγορα και μου φάνηκαν εύκολα - πριν μελετήσω τα υπόλοιπα με τη δέουσα δαίουσα προσοχή - τα εξής τέσσερα πέντε:

176. Organ donors put their heart into it.

Οι δωρητές οργάνων τα δίνουν όλα / δίνουν όλο τους το είναι.

180. As the shoe said to the hat, 'You go on ahead, and I'll follow on foot'. 

Όπως είπε το παπούτσι στο καπέλο, «Προχώρα εσύ επικεφαλής κι εγώ θ' ακολουθήσω κατά πόδας». 

 181. An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either. 

Ένας αόρατος άντρας παντρεύτηκε μια αόρατη γυναίκα. Τα παιδιά τους δεν βλέπονταν.

182. He had a photographic memory that was never developed. 

Είχε φωτογραφική μνήμη που όμως δεν εμφανίστηκε ποτέ. 

198. It's true I don't like soap, but you don't have to rub it in my face! 

Αλήθεια είναι πως δε μ' αρέσει το σαπούνι, αλλά δεν είναι ανάγκη να μου το τρίβεις στη μούρη!


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## azimuthios (Jun 29, 2012)

Ωραίος, δαεμάνε! Έχεις όρεξη βλέπω. 

Μια παραλλαγή του πρώτου θα μπορούσε να είναι: Θα έδινα και το δεξί μου χέρι για να γίνω δωρητής οργάνων! :)


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## daeman (Jun 29, 2012)

...
Well, I and I (me and my daemon) have an eye for puns and a sweet tooth for anything with sharp teeth, biting. 
You should have known that by now. Bye now.


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## daeman (Jun 30, 2012)

azimuthios said:


> Ωραίος, δαεμάνε! Έχεις όρεξη βλέπω.
> 
> Μια παραλλαγή του πρώτου θα μπορούσε να είναι: Θα έδινα και το δεξί μου χέρι για να γίνω δωρητής οργάνων! :)


I'd give my right arm to become a limb donor. 

I'd give my liver to become an organ donor. 

I'd give my all to become an organ donor.  


I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous.

Θα 'δινα και το δεξί μου χέρι για να γίνω αμφιδέξιος.

Και άλλα οξύμωρα εκεί, τροφή για άλλο νήμα.


----------



## azimuthios (Jun 30, 2012)

Και άλλες σκέψεις: 

Οι δωρητές οργάνων όταν υπογράφουν τη φόρμα εξουσιοδότησης, το κάνουν με την καρδιά τους/με την καλή τους την καρδιά. 

Θέλει καρδιά/στομάχι/άντερα, για να γίνεις δωρητής οργάνων.


----------



## daeman (Jun 30, 2012)

...
Άλλα δυο που πέτυχα στο σημερινό ηλεδελτίο του Κουίνιον, το δεύτερο κατά λάθος αλλά καλό:

Jeff Kabacinski lightened his gentle criticism by ending his message, “though it does bring to mind that old chemistry joke, 
‘*If you’re not a part of the solution, you’re a part of the precipitate*’.” 
http://www.worldwidewords.org/nl/mucy.htm#N1

Raymond Noë wrote from The Netherlands concerning a headline he had seen in the _New York Daily News_ of 26 June: 
“*Reading books will help shorten Brazilian prisoners’ sentences*”. But as he says, improved literacy may equally result in their sentences getting longer.
http://www.worldwidewords.org/nl/mucy.htm#N5


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## azimuthios (Jul 5, 2012)

Χθες το πρωί ταξίδευα για Βαρκελώνη με τον Ίγκι Ποπ. Και κατεβαίνοντας για να πάμε στην παραλαβή αποσκευών σκεφτόμουν: αν κάποιος δολοφονήσει τον Ίγκι Ποπ, οι αμερικανικές εφημερίδες θα γράφουν Iggy Popped στους τίτλους τους; :) :)


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## bernardina (Jul 5, 2012)

azimuthios said:


> Και άλλες σκέψεις:
> 
> Οι δωρητές οργάνων όταν υπογράφουν τη φόρμα εξουσιοδότησης, το κάνουν με την καρδιά τους/με την καλή τους την καρδιά.
> 
> Θέλει καρδιά/στομάχι/άντερα, για να γίνεις δωρητής οργάνων.



Ωστόσο, στην ερώτηση "ποια η στάση σας ως προς τη δωρεά οργάνων;" η απάντηση "πάρτε τα χμχμ μου" κατά κανόνα δεν θα πρέπει να θεωρείται θετική.


----------



## daeman (Jul 7, 2012)

...
Κι άλλο αθέλητο (ή κλείσιμο του ματιού από τον συντάκτη της Telegraph), πάλι με αφορμή το σημερινό του Κουίνιον: 

 On 29 June the _Daily Telegraph_ told of a drunken night out before a friend’s impending marriage that ended in a prosecution for animal cruelty. Ian McIver was intrigued by this sentence: “Mr Hammond later studied the hotel’s CCTV and found footage of *the Barnett brothers taking the hens up to the stag’s room after they claimed they had been egged on by others*.” 

Stag-do brothers prosecuted by RSPCA after chicken prank goes wrong


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## Zazula (Aug 28, 2012)

201. I usually take steps to avoid elevators.
202. The patron saint of poverty is St. Nickeless.
203. The orthopaedist slipped outside for a break.
204. He has been a jogger for three years running.
205. I got a gold filling and put my money where my mouth is.
206. He had a difficult time bouncing back from his bungee cord accident.
207. No one knew she had a dental implant until it came out in a conversation.
208. Now that the water slide is built, it is time to give it a dry run.
209. It's a lengthy article on Japanese Sword Fighters but I can Samurais it for you.
210. You want to clone yourself? Now wouldn't that be just like you!


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## nickel (Aug 28, 2012)

Καλημέρα. 



Zazula said:


> 202. The patron saint of poverty is St. Nickeless.


Με πληγώνει διπλά...


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## Zazula (Aug 28, 2012)

Γιατί σε πληγώνει διπλά; Εννοεί πως όποιο φόρουμ μένει nickel-less, γίνεται ακραία φτωχό.


----------



## Zazula (Nov 1, 2012)




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## Zazula (Nov 1, 2012)

211. I wrote a novel about a fellow who had a small garden. It didn't have much of a plot.
212. I didn't have the faintest idea as to why I passed out.
213. A relief map shows where the restrooms are.
214. There was a big paddle sale at the boat store. It was quite an oar deal.
215. There was a sale at the fish market today. I went to see what was the catch.
216. I finally got rid of that nasty electrical charge I've been carrying. I'm ex-static!
217. When I asked the man how he became a ditch-digger, he said he just fell into it.
218. I'm glad I know sign language, it's pretty handy.
219. A chiropractor's patients must crack under pressure.
220. That soil scientist always travels by himself. He's a loam ranger.


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## nickel (Nov 1, 2012)

Zazula said:


> 220. That soil scientist always travels by himself. He's a loam ranger.


GOL! Groaning out loud!





Καλημέρα. Μετά από τόσα λογοπαίγνια, νομίζω ότι χρειάζεται και το σχετικό εικονίδιο.


----------



## drsiebenmal (Nov 1, 2012)

nickel said:


> GOL! Groaning out loud!


GOAL! Groaning out awfully loud... :)


----------



## Themis (Dec 7, 2012)

Πήξαμε στα αγγλικά, ας πούμε κι ένα γαλλικό. Προέκυψε από τη σημερινή οινοεπιλογή, οινογνωσία και οινολογία.
- Πώς λέγεται ο αφρώδης οίνος στα γαλλικά;
- Vin affreux.
Φρικώδης ο αφρώδης; Προσυπογράφω, με κάποια ελαφρυντικά για τον γνήσιο καμπανίτη.


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## bernardina (Dec 7, 2012)

Themis said:


> - Πώς λέγεται ο αφρώδης οίνος στα γαλλικά;
> - Vin affreux.



Αχ, μού θύμισες εκείνο το παλιό, αλλά καλό: 
- Πώς λέγεται το ασανσέρ στα γαλλικά;
- Anelcysture!


----------



## Costas (Dec 14, 2012)

Μείναμε βράχοι στα αθωνικά βράχια, γιατί πολλά απ’ τα μοναστήρια μας, μεταξύ των οποίων και το δικό μας, λέγονται «Monasteries of Rocks», μοναστήρια των βράχων.

Κι αν κι εσείς, όπως πολλοί ροκάδες, χάσατε το Rock (βράχος=σταθερότητα) και σας έμεινε το Roll (κύλισμα=προσαρμοστικότητα), ελάτε να βρείτε το Rock στους αγιορειτικούς βράχους, όπως χιλιάδες νεοέλληνες, ιδίως νέοι. Σίγουρα θα αισθανθείτε πάλι ρωμιός, θα σας βγεί το ρωμαίικο φιλότιμο και θα ακούσετε το ορθόδοξο «ρόκ του μέλλοντός μας». (Επιστολή μοναχού προς Μίκη, έτος 2000)


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## Zazula (Sep 17, 2013)

Οπτικοποιημένα λογοπαίγνια της αγγλικής:


----------



## Zazula (Nov 19, 2013)




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## daeman (Dec 13, 2013)

Zazula said:


> 39. I was going to buy a book on phobias, but I was afraid it wouldn't help me.
> ...



Θα πήγαινα να διαβάσω το νήμα με τις φοβίες, αλλά φοβήθηκα πως δεν θα με βοηθούσε.  

Να θυμηθώ:
1. το κινητό. No mo' nomophobia
2. να μην ξεχάσω την αθαζαγοραφοβία και να φροντίσω να μη με ξεχάσει κι αυτή


----------



## daeman (Feb 9, 2014)

...






Το λυσάρι: *screwage*, Arnold Zwicky's Blog (mostly about language):

It turns out that _screwage_ is attested in at least three senses, involving differet [sic] bases _screw_ and different uses of the derivational suffix _-age_.

First, there’s the _screwage_ the waiter intended, which is in _OED_2, where, however, it’s marked as rare:The action or process of screwing.
​with only one cite:1865 T. Carlyle _Hist. Friedrich II of Prussia_ VI. xx. vi. 146 The Butes and Hardwickes working incessantly with such rare power of leverage and screwage in the interior parts.

​Then there’s the _screwage_ the waiter was avoiding. From Spears’s _Dictionary of American Slang and Colloquial Expressions_, 4th ed. (2007):copulation; acts of copulation; the people and actions of copulation: _ His mind is on nothing but “screwage” and how to get some of it._
​(This has _screw_ ‘fuck’.)

Finally, there’s a computer sense, which the Jargon File (12/1/94) characterizes as:Like _lossage_ but connotes that the failure is due to a designed-in misfeature rather than a simple inadequacy or a mere bug.
​(This appears to have the _screw_ of _screw up_.)

Πηγή: http://arnoldzwicky.org/2013/10/10/screwage/

What is a corkage fee?


----------



## daeman (Feb 11, 2014)

...




http://bizarrocomic.blogspot.gr

Μπιζαρωνόμαστε, και τώρα τελευταία και πιο παλιά. 
Εκτός από το λογοπαικτικό, για το γλωσσικό: *Τα ομόηχα και τα ομώνυμα, είναι τελικά συνώνυμα;*


----------



## daeman (Apr 30, 2014)




----------



## drsiebenmal (May 12, 2014)




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## daeman (Jul 20, 2014)

www.answerbag.com/q_view/1000977







Btw: *Verbing your nouns: does it weird language?*

«Tut, tut! Grace me no grace, nor uncle me no uncle:  I am no traitor’s uncle...»


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## daeman (Jul 23, 2014)




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## daeman (Jul 31, 2014)

The Little Prince 

The little


----------



## nickel (Jul 31, 2014)

Δεν μπορώ, θα πω τι συνέβη προ ημερών που γυρίζαμε με μέλος του φόρουμ από τους Μόντι.

Είμαστε στο λεωφορείο και έχουμε κάτσει με την ΑΜ σε απέναντι καθίσματα στο διάδρομο. Δίπλα στην ΑΜ είναι ένα νεαρό κορίτσι. Κάποια στιγμή προσέχω το πόδι της καθώς το σταυρώνει πάνω από το άλλο γόνατο. Δίπλα στον αστράγαλο έχει φτιάξει ένα απλό τατουάζ με τον ελέφαντα μέσα στο φίδι που μοιάζει με καπέλο.
— Α, Εξιπερί, λέω στην ΑΜ.
— Ναι, το πρόσεξα πριν, μου λέει αυτή.
— Θα το έχει κάνει για να τεστάρει τα αρσενικά, λέω.
Πάει σε λίγο να κατέβει το κορίτσι, οπότε η ΑΜ τη ρωτάει:
— Πες μας γιατί μας έχει φάει η περιέργεια: πόσοι έχουν καταλάβει από πού είναι το τατουάζ σου;
— Ένας, λέει αυτή.
Οπότε αποφασίσαμε ότι το τεστ είναι δύσκολο.


----------



## daeman (Jul 31, 2014)

nickel said:


> ...
> Οπότε αποφασίσαμε ότι το τεστ είναι δύσκολο.
> ...



I Need Air (It's A Hat) (_The Little Prince_, 1974) - The Pilot, Chorus





music: Frederic Loewe, lyrics: Alan Jay Lerner

It's a hat, it's a hat
if it's anything, it's a hat

Not Picasso or Corot 
But a very nice chapeau

Are you kidding? 
It's a hat, you silly brat!








Ο Μπομπ *Φόσσσι (Μπομπ Φόσι) *σστο ρόλο του φιδιού *σσσυρίζζει και *φιδογυρίζζει.


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## drsiebenmal (Jun 1, 2015)

When you add '-ing' to movie titles...


----------



## nickel (Aug 22, 2015)

Είπα να το βάλω εδώ λόγω τίτλου στο CNN.com:

*Peak performance: The man who runs across mountains*

(CNN)When presented with the challenge of crossing five alpine peaks, most people would probably choose to fly. Andreas Steindl wasn't one of them -- he ran.

Earlier this month, the 26-year-old athlete covered more than 30 treacherous kilometers from Zermatt to Saas Fee, Switzerland, on foot.

On the way, he crossed five 4,000-meter peaks including the Dom, the highest mountain in Switzerland, in just seven and three-quarter hours. [...]

http://edition.cnn.com/2015/08/20/sport/andreas-steindl-alps-mountain-run/​


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## Zazula (Aug 22, 2015)

Ο άνθρωπος κυριολεκτικά πήρε τα βουνά.


----------



## daeman (Oct 1, 2015)

+ σχόλια από κάτω:

—You could hear Jimmy Page Robert Plant while Roger Waters.

—Did Richard Wright this?

—With Hugo Weaving?

—Wouldn't Stevie Wonder?

—Brian May be there...

—And Tom Waits.

—Tom Waits while Jeremy Irons:







Planters will plant, Waterers will water, punsters will pun. 

As for me: Will Smith words for cash.


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## daeman (Oct 9, 2015)




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## Themis (Oct 9, 2015)

*Codaeman*: Ο εν Δαεμάνω Δαεμάνος.
_Daeman was about to do it, but Codaeman opposed a decisive veto claiming chairmanship of the meeting._


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## daeman (Oct 10, 2015)

Themis said:


> *Codaeman*: Ο εν Δαεμάνω Δαεμάνος.
> _Daeman was about to do it, but Codaeman opposed a decisive veto claiming chairmanship of the meeting._



Once a CodeMan, always a code man. It's just that lately I'm intrigued by decoding. Both of me, that is, although frequently one of me is coding while the other me is decoding. Multiplicity, out of phase perhaps, but a functional composite of opposites. 


code monkey: An affectionate term for a specific kind of underpaid, overworked (often by volition), increasingly underappreciated indentured servant, otherwise known as a Software Programmer. 

Monkey see, monkey do, while the inner, non-indentured monkey sneers and monkeys around.


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## daeman (Nov 10, 2015)




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## nickel (Nov 10, 2015)

Θαυμάσια συλλογή. Τα περισσότερα δεν τα είχα ξανακούσει. Για την ακρίβεια, ακόμη δεν έχω ακούσει κανένα, αλλά δύο τα είχα διαβάσει παλιότερα.


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## daeman (Dec 25, 2015)

May the fourth be with you, henceforth. 

I'll settle for the fifth, and an R2-D2 toaster. The Force is strong with it.


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## nickel (Jan 6, 2016)

Με ποιο φτηνό λογοπαίγνιο προώθησε ο Σπάικ Λι την ταινία του Chi-Raq (πρώτη ταινία των Amazon Studios), ένα σατιρικό μιούζικαλ βασισμένο στο κόνσεπτ της Λυσιστράτης; *No peace, no piece.* 

Όπως λέει η Wikipedia, η ταινία ήταν καλύτερη από το σλόγκαν της σύμφωνα με τους κριτικούς, αλλά το κοινό ίσως διαφωνεί: 5,6/10 στο imdb.


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## daeman (Jan 14, 2016)

Are you trying to preposition me?


----------



## daeman (Jan 18, 2016)

Or in the Mos Eisley Cantina:


----------



## daeman (Feb 13, 2016)

> Aloe? Vera speaking.




Aloe? Angelica speaking.


----------



## dharvatis (Apr 15, 2016)

daeman said:


> Είπαμε, είμαι B-52, βαρύ βομβαρδιστικό και αργώ. Αλλά όταν φτάσω...



Χαχαχα! Ναι, σωστά!


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## nickel (Apr 15, 2016)

Η ταινία: _The Finest Hours_

Αν δεν την ξέρετε, η περιγραφή στο imdb λέει:

The Coast Guard makes a daring rescue attempt off the coast of Cape Cod after a pair of oil tankers are destroyed during a blizzard in 1952.

Ερχόμαστε τώρα σε κατεβασάδικο, όπου οι χρήστες ρωτάνε συχνά αν υπάρχουν υπότιτλοι. Οπότε διαβάζω τον διάλογο:

— Thank you. Very good movie  
— Subs?
— No, oil tankers.


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## daeman (May 28, 2016)

"A bad pun, however, is a rework."


----------



## daeman (May 28, 2016)

A wolf, as it were. Reworded.


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## nickel (May 28, 2016)

A has-been wolf.


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## daeman (May 28, 2016)

nickel said:


> A has-been wolf. ...



A wannabe wolf:








A wish-I-were-a-wolf. Or were-I-that-wolf, perhaps:



Spoiler











Canis lupus too familiaris (_cf._ wolfing [SUB]2[/SUB])


----------



## daeman (May 29, 2016)

...
Από τα λογοπαίγνια για werewolf, δεν μπορεί να λείπει αυτό, βέβαια:






—Werewolf.
—Werewolf?
—There.
—What?
—There wolf.

Who's on first. Where?


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## daeman (Oct 7, 2016)




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## drsiebenmal (Oct 7, 2016)

Δηλαδή, όλοι αυτοί που λένε ότι το χιούμορ μου είναι σαρκαστικό, να υποθέσω ότι δεν το λένε για καλό;


----------



## daeman (Oct 7, 2016)

...
Άλλο σαρκασμός, άλλο σάρχασμα.  Χαρ, χαρ, χαρ, καγχάζω.

Εγώ πάντως μια χαρά το βλέπω το χιούμορ σου, σαρκαστικό και ποτέ σαγχαζικό, να το κοιτάζω σα χαζό.


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## daeman (Oct 20, 2016)

Declination is not declension, but declining is both. 

Θα έστεκε και στ' Αγγλικά αν δεν ήταν το καταραμένο άρθρο: "I am declining invite" vs. "I am declining the invite."
For grammar nerds only.


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## Philip (Oct 21, 2016)

Ο grammar nerd της γειτονιάς σας απαντάει: αν απαντούσε απλώς 'I'm declining' σώζεται το λογοπαίγνιο


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## daeman (Oct 21, 2016)

—Descartes, do you think it will rain today?
—Um... I don't think so.

Cogito ergo sum. Penso dunque sono. I think, therefore I am. I don't think, therefore...


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## nickel (Nov 24, 2016)

Ό,τι είχε και δεν είχε στο απόθεμα αστείων για τις γαλοπούλες, το κατάθεσε ο Ομπάμα στην τελευταία τελετή απονομής χάρης στη γαλοπούλα της Ημέρας των Ευχαριστιών.

*President Obama's 2016 Turkey-Pardon Dad Jokes: The Definitive List*

http://www.npr.org/2016/11/23/50317...6-turkey-pardon-dad-jokes-the-definitive-list


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## dharvatis (Nov 28, 2016)

All 50 States Reimagined as Food Puns

Fishigan! New Pork! Berryland! :lol: :lol: :lol:


----------



## daeman (Jan 15, 2017)




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## daeman (Jan 20, 2017)

En > El > En


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## daeman (Jan 28, 2017)

nickel said:


> Ό,τι είχε και δεν είχε στο απόθεμα αστείων για τις γαλοπούλες, το κατάθεσε ο Ομπάμα στην τελευταία τελετή απονομής χάρης στη γαλοπούλα της Ημέρας των Ευχαριστιών.
> 
> *President Obama's 2016 Turkey-Pardon Dad Jokes: The Definitive List*
> 
> http://www.npr.org/2016/11/23/50317...6-turkey-pardon-dad-jokes-the-definitive-list



*President Trump Orders the Execution of Five Turkeys Pardoned by Obama*

WASHINGTON, D.C. – In another sweeping move aimed at undoing the perceived damage done by the Obama administration, President Donald J. Trump signed an executive order on Tuesday directing the Department of Justice to revoke all sixteen Thanksgiving Day turkey pardons issued by the former president during his eight years in office.

“After reviewing the decisions made by the previous administration, President Trump has determined that a number of turkey pardons issued by Barack Obama were done so in a manner that was both deceitful and hazardous to the American people,” White House Press Secretary Sean Spicer announced on Tuesday. “This morning, the president once again used his executive powers to see to it that justice is served and that the surviving creatures will be destroyed.”
[...]

Καταναλώστε ανεύθυνα.


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## daeman (Mar 13, 2017)

via Steve the vagabond and silly linguist


----------



## dharvatis (Apr 11, 2017)

How Many Of These Puns Can You Guess?


----------



## AoratiMelani (Apr 11, 2017)

Το 3 το πέρασα για


Spoiler



french toast. Προφανώς δεν αξιολόγησα σωστά τη γλώσσα.


----------



## dharvatis (Apr 11, 2017)

Μα...


Spoiler







:laugh::laugh:


----------



## nickel (Apr 11, 2017)

Κάποια είναι καλά (ναι, με αυτό το αποπάνω γέλασα πολύ), πολλά είναι τραβηγμένα, αλλά εκεί που ρίχνω ξύλο είναι τα λογοπαίγνια που προδίδουν προφορές (ένα είδος faux puns), όπως η προσπάθεια να εξομοιωθεί το peas με το peace. Γκαπ!


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## Wordmaniac (Jun 27, 2017)

What did Adam say on the day before Christmas?
It’s Christmas, Eve
Όταν το πρώτο άκουσα έσκασα στα γέλια!


----------



## daeman (Jun 27, 2017)

Wordmaniac said:


> What did Adam say on the day before Christmas?
> It’s Christmas, Eve
> Όταν το πρώτο άκουσα έσκασα στα γέλια!



Ποιο πρώτο; Το πρωτάκουστο;


----------



## daeman (Sep 27, 2017)




----------



## Duke_of_Waltham (Oct 11, 2017)

Δεν ξέρω αν παρακολουθεί κανείς το _The Good Place_, αλλά ένα από τα αστεία της σειράς είναι ότι τα φαγάδικα που εμφανίζονται στο Καλό Μέρος έχουν συχνά κάποιο λογοπαίγνιο στο όνομά τους, όπως η πιτσαρία Hawaii 5-Dough ή το Sushi and the Banshees. Πολλά από αυτά είναι, προφανώς (και επίτηδες), απαίσια. Μπορείτε να δείτε εκτενή λίστα τέτοιων τροφολογοπαιγνίων εδώ.

ΥΓ: Μην ψάξετε για πρόσφατα άρθρα σχετικά με τη σειρά αν ενδιαφέρεστε να τη δείτε, γιατί τα spoiler αφθονούν. Πρόκειται για έξυπνη σειρά, γεμάτη ανατροπές, και αυτός είναι ένας από τους λόγους που τη συνιστώ. (Ένας άλλος: ο Τεντ Ντάνσον σε μεγάλα κέφια.)


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## dharvatis (Oct 15, 2017)

Orion's belt is a big waist of space...


----------



## daeman (Oct 23, 2017)




----------



## daeman (Nov 3, 2017)

Harrison Ford dressed as a nun on Halloween.

Han Nun Solo


----------



## daeman (Feb 7, 2018)




----------



## daeman (Mar 28, 2018)




----------



## Duke_of_Waltham (May 26, 2018)

*Now is the winter of our disco tent*



_(από εδώ)_


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## daeman (May 26, 2018)

Duke_of_Waltham said:


> View attachment 5904
> 
> _(από εδώ)_



:) https://lexilogia.gr/forum/showthre...αι-για-κλάματα&p=239831&viewfull=1#post239831

Bonus: Now is the winter of our discount tents: https://lexilogia.gr/forum/showthre...αι-για-κλάματα&p=239824&viewfull=1#post239824


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## dharvatis (Jul 1, 2018)

Euripides!


----------



## Themis (Jul 14, 2018)

Λίγο μακάβριο αλλά καλό.


----------



## dharvatis (Jul 15, 2018)

A classics professor goes to a tailor to get his trousers mended. The tailor asks: “Euripides?” The professor replies: “Yes. Eumenides?”


----------



## Duke_of_Waltham (Jul 15, 2018)

This is so awful. It must go on to infect others.


----------



## dharvatis (Jul 16, 2018)




----------



## Zazula (Dec 3, 2018)

Καλό για μεταφραστική άσκηση σε λογοπαίγνια:
[video]https://www.facebook.com/bbccomedy/videos/nine-minutes-of-one-liners-from-gary-delaney-live-at-the-apollo/855732078147989/[/video]

__ https://twitter.com/i/web/status/1035521651117576193


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## nickel (Dec 7, 2018)

Zazula said:


> Καλό για μεταφραστική άσκηση σε λογοπαίγνια:
> [video]https://www.facebook.com/bbccomedy/videos/nine-minutes-of-one-liners-from-gary-delaney-live-at-the-apollo/855732078147989/[/video]
> 
> __ https://twitter.com/i/web/status/1035521651117576193



Όπως:
When I heard you could now be a sperm donor by post, I came in a jiffy.

ΔΕΝ ΜΕΤΑΦΡΑΖΟΝΤΑΙ ΤΑ ΛΟΓΟΠΑΙΓΝΙΑ!


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## Zazula (Dec 8, 2018)

nickel said:


> Όπως:
> When I heard you could now be a sperm donor by post, I came in a jiffy.


Όταν έμαθα πως μπορώ να γίνω δωρητής σπέρματος ταχυδρομικά, αμέσως ταχυσοδρόμησα.


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## Viron (Dec 9, 2018)

Ενδιαφέρουσα θεματολογία.Όντως θα μπορούσε καθείς να μεταφράσει-ερμηνεύσει κατά το δοκούν ένα λογοπαίγνιο.

56. She got fired from the hot dog stand for putting her hair in a bun.

--> Μάλλον ήταν παραπάνω καθαρή ,από όσο θα 'πρεπε, για τη δουλειά αυτή.


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## AoratiMelani (Dec 9, 2018)

Ε ναι, διότι όταν μεταφράζεις ένα λογοπαίγνιο, κατά κανόνα δημιουργείς ένα άλλο λογοπαίγνιο (εκτός από τις περιπτώσεις που τυχαίνει να βγαίνει το ίδιο λογοπαίγνιο και στις δυο γλώσσες). Θα προσπαθήσεις βέβαια να κρατήσεις μια παρόμοια θεματική, να διατηρήσεις ίδιο το πρώτο ή το δεύτερο μέρος, ούτως ή άλλως όμως, δημιουργείς εκ νέου.


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## daeman (Dec 9, 2018)

AoratiMelani said:


> Ε ναι, διότι όταν μεταφράζεις ένα λογοπαίγνιο, κατά κανόνα δημιουργείς ένα άλλο λογοπαίγνιο (εκτός από τις περιπτώσεις που τυχαίνει να βγαίνει το ίδιο λογοπαίγνιο και στις δυο γλώσσες). Θα προσπαθήσεις βέβαια να κρατήσεις μια παρόμοια θεματική, να διατηρήσεις ίδιο το πρώτο ή το δεύτερο μέρος, ούτως ή άλλως όμως, δημιουργείς εκ νέου.





daeman said:


> "A bad pun, however, is a rework."



:) :) :)


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## nickel (Dec 9, 2018)

daeman said:


> "A bad pun, however, is a rework."



*a dead pun*

(In this case, a dead link.)​


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## nickel (Dec 12, 2018)

«…το προσφυγικό είναι ένα πρόβλημα καθολικό, γι’ αυτό ήρθε και ο προκαθήμενος της Καθολικής Εκκλησίας σε μια κίνηση ιδιαίτερου συμβολισμού…»
(Από συνέντευξη του Α. Τσίπρα στην ΕΡΤ, εδώ: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=na2t6fj6Y5A )

Άντε να το μεταφράσεις σαν λογοπαίγνιο.


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## Duke_of_Waltham (Dec 15, 2018)

Απόπειρα για καθολικούς μόνο. 

"...immigration is a universal problem, which is why the Pontiff of the Universal Church came here, in an especially symbolic move..."


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## Zazula (Dec 26, 2018)




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## nickel (Dec 26, 2018)

Α, μου θύμισες ένα από τα πιο ωραία που είδα αυτές τις μέρες!


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## Earion (Dec 26, 2018)

Αυτό όμως απευθύνεται ειδικά σε γνώστες του Τόλκιν.... :twit:
Που ξέρω ότι δεν είσαι. :laugh:


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## nickel (Dec 26, 2018)

Earion said:


> Αυτό όμως απευθύνεται ειδικά σε γνώστες του Τόλκιν.... :twit:
> Που ξέρω ότι δεν είσαι. :laugh:



Εντάξει. Ούτε στα ντίλντο θεωρούμαι ειδικός...


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## Zazula (Dec 27, 2018)




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## nickel (Jan 24, 2019)

Pizza!


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## daeman (Jan 25, 2019)

translanguaging


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## daeman (Jan 26, 2019)

Αγγλοελληνικό με απλο(λο)γία —ή με τηλεσκοπική σύνθεση. Ναρκίσσυφος.


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## daeman (May 23, 2019)




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## nickel (May 25, 2019)

Το είδα σε τοίχο του Facebook και μου άρεσε:
*
Όταν καταφεύγεις σε αγγλόφωνο μέντιουμ που σου λέει "May's end will come on the 24th" κι εσύ σπεύδεις να πληρώσεις νωρίτερα τις συντάξεις...*


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## Lexoplast (May 26, 2019)

Αφού το πήγαμε εκεί, πολλά τα λογοπαίγνια May's - maze τους τελευταίους μήνες, όπως Exiting May's Brexit Maze στο Φορμπζ και τώρα με το May's / Maze Exit.

Όχι, δε διαβάζω Φορμπζ.


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## SBE (May 27, 2019)

Εμένα μου άρεσε το June 7th is the end of May.


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## nickel (Aug 19, 2019)

*"I keep randomly shouting out 'Broccoli' and 'Cauliflower' - I think I might have florets".*

Το παραπάνω λογοπαίγνιο κέρδισε στον ετήσιο (12ο) διαγωνισμό αστειότερου λογοπαίγνιου στο Φεστιβάλ Fringe του Εδιμβούργου.

Στη βραχεία νύστα βρίσκουμε τα παρακάτω:


 "Someone stole my antidepressants. Whoever they are, I hope they're happy" - Richard Stott
 "What's driving Brexit? From here it looks like it's probably the Duke of Edinburgh" - Milton Jones
 "A cowboy asked me if I could help him round up 18 cows. I said, 'Yes, of course. - That's 20 cows'" - Jake Lambert
 "A thesaurus is great. There's no other word for it" - Ross Smith
 "Sleep is my favourite thing in the world. It's the reason I get up in the morning" - Ross Smith
 "I accidentally booked myself onto an escapology course; I'm really struggling to get out of it" - Adele Cliff
 "After learning six hours of basic semaphore, I was flagging - Richard Pulsford
 "To be or not to be a horse rider, that is Equestrian" - Mark Simmons
 "I've got an Eton-themed advent calendar, where all the doors are opened for me by my dad's contacts" - Ivo Graham
https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-scotland-edinburgh-east-fife-49389208


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## sarant (Sep 11, 2019)

Μου άρεσε πολύ ο τίτλος του Εκόνομιστ με δύο λογοπαίγνια:

Soaring pork prices hog headlines and sow discontent in China


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## dharvatis (Sep 11, 2019)

Χαχαχα!


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## SBE (Sep 11, 2019)

Δεν ξερω ποιός είναι ο τιτλατζής του Εκόνομιστ, αλλά κάθε βδομάδα έχει κάτι καλό. Αυτο είναι κορυφαίο.


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## Themis (Sep 13, 2019)

Κορυφαίο!


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## dharvatis (Nov 14, 2019)

The Centaur for Disease Control!


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## nickel (Nov 14, 2019)

In spite of being a little hoarse.


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## Lexoplast (Nov 14, 2019)

You can lead the hoarse to water, but you can't make them drink. 
(Δροσούλα...)


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## nickel (Dec 9, 2019)

Spelling, guys!

Koalition - Opossition


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## daeman (Mar 8, 2020)

...
Today's Lunchbox Lesson: GRAMMAR BAR JOKES

A dangling participle walks into a bar. Enjoying a cocktail and chatting with the bartender, the evening passes pleasantly.

A bar was walked into by the passive voice.

An oxymoron walked into a bar, and the silence was deafening.

Two quotation marks walk into a “bar.”

A malapropism walks into a bar, looking for all intensive purposes like a wolf in cheap clothing, muttering epitaphs and casting dispersions on his magnificent other, who takes him for granite.

Hyperbole totally rips into this insane bar and absolutely destroys everything.

A question mark walks into a bar?

A non sequitur walks into a bar. In a strong wind, even turkeys can fly.

Papyrus and Comic Sans walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Get out -- we don't serve your type."

A mixed metaphor walks into a bar, seeing the handwriting on the wall but hoping to nip it in the bud.

A comma splice walks into a bar, it has a drink and then leaves.

Three intransitive verbs walk into a bar. They sit. They converse. They depart.

A synonym strolls into a tavern.

At the end of the day, a cliché walks into a bar -- fresh as a daisy, cute as a button, and sharp as a tack.

A run-on sentence walks into a bar it starts flirting. With a cute little sentence fragment.

Falling slowly, slowly falling, the chiasmus collapses to the bar floor.

A figure of speech literally walks into a bar and ends up getting figuratively hammered.

An allusion walks into a bar, despite the fact that alcohol is its Achilles heel.

The subjunctive would have walked into a bar, had it only known.

A misplaced modifier walks into a bar owned by a man with a glass eye named Ralph.

The past, present, and future walked into a bar. It was tense.

A verb walks into a bar, sees a beautiful noun, and suggests they conjugate. The noun declines.

An Oxford comma walks into a bar, where it spends the evening watching the television, getting drunk, and smoking cigars.

A simile walks into a bar, as parched as a desert.

A gerund and an infinitive walk into a bar, drinking to forget.

A hyphenated word and a non-hyphenated word walk into a bar and the bartender nearly chokes on the irony.


*Author(s) unknown

https://www.facebook.com/analyticalgrammar/photos/a.167941616890/10156850934631891/?type=3&theater


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## dharvatis (Jul 3, 2020)

[British English]

Where does a cop live?

999 Letsby Avenue.



Spoiler



... let's be having you... :-D


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## daeman (Oct 2, 2020)




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## daeman (Nov 12, 2020)




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## dharvatis (Nov 18, 2020)

*...love-in-a-canoe coffee...* (Terry Pratchett, _Guards! Guards!_)


Spoiler: because...



...it's f***ing close to water!


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## daeman (Nov 18, 2020)

dharvatis said:


> *...love-in-a-canoe coffee...* (Terry Pratchett, _Guards! Guards!_)
> 
> 
> Spoiler: because...
> ...


Αυτό θα πει «καφές καραβίσιος». Νερόπλυμα.


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## dharvatis (Nov 20, 2020)

They told me I wouldn’t be good at poettry because I'm dyslexic. But so far I’ve made 3 jugs and a vase and they are lovely.
(Το πρωτότυπο έλεγε poetry αλλά νομίζω ότι έτσι είναι πιο αστείο)


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## dharvatis (Feb 5, 2021)

- Which country has the most birds?
- ...?
- Portu_geese_
- Wait - that's a language!
- Portu_gull_
- Nice recovery...
- Don't you mean "nice re_dove_ry"?
- Turkey! How did we miss Turkey?


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## nickel (Apr 12, 2021)

Όταν δεν μπορείς να πάρεις περιοδικό στο μπάνιο...


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## dharvatis (Apr 23, 2021)




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## cougr (Apr 23, 2021)

Τώρα είδα το #142 παραπάνω.
Σίγουρα δίνει άλλη έννοια στην συμβουλή ότι τα τακτικά ντους και μπάνια είναι ένας από τους στοιχειώδεις κανόνες ατομικής υγιεινής.


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## pontios (Apr 23, 2021)

cougr said:


> Τώρα είδα το #142 παραπάνω.
> Σίγουρα δίνει άλλη έννοια στην συμβουλή ότι τα τακτικά ντους και μπάνια είναι ένας από τους στοιχειώδεις κανόνες ατομικής υγιεινής.



I was trying to think of something funny to add, but all the good puns Argon.


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## cougr (Apr 23, 2021)

Good one, pontios. But I'm not sure I fully agree.

Daily showers are elementary to good hygiene.


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## pontios (Apr 23, 2021)

cougr said:


> Good one, pontios. But I'm not sure I fully agree.
> 
> Daily showers are elementary to good hygiene.


True ... HeHeHe (3 helium atoms for that comeback pun).


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## cougr (Apr 23, 2021)

That's gold!

I could extend the idea with gold within the overall context here, but let's not get too carried away.


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## dharvatis (May 3, 2021)




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## cougr (May 4, 2021)

Καταπληκτική φωτογραφία. 

I'm wondering, is it a shellfie?


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## nickel (May 4, 2021)

It's so shell-centred, it's almost a selfish.


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## nickel (Sep 18, 2021)

Εκτός από τα λογοπαίγνια που βασίζονται σε πολυσημίες και ομώνυμα, έχουμε και τα λογοπαίγνια που βασίζονται σε ομόηχα.


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## dharvatis (Oct 9, 2021)




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## nickel (Oct 10, 2021)

*How do you tell the sex of an ant? 
Drop it in water...
If it sinks: girl ant.
If it floats...*


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## daeman (Oct 10, 2021)

Thuperb.


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## daeman (Oct 12, 2021)




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## cougr (Oct 19, 2021)




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## Zazula (Oct 19, 2021)

cougr said:


> View attachment 7044


When life gives you melons, you're lucky as hell!


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## nickel (Oct 24, 2021)

Αναρωτιέται κανείς πού έχει μείνει η λογοτεχνική κατάρτιση του μπαμπά του...


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## nickel (Dec 7, 2021)

Δυσκολεύτηκα να το πιστέψω αλλά είναι ακριβές:

February 22nd, 2022, falls on a *Tuesday*, so we will be able to call it *2's day*.


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## Earion (Dec 23, 2021)




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## daeman (Feb 20, 2022)

A Night in Casablanca (1946)


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## daeman (Apr 16, 2022)

I'm re-tired
Tired of playing the game
Ain't it a crying shame
I'm so re-tired
God dammit, I'm exhausted!


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## nickel (Jun 15, 2022)

Ούτε η μάσκα δεν σε σώζει από τα αγγλικά λογοπαίγνια...


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## nickel (Jun 19, 2022)




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## cougr (Jun 20, 2022)

Now that's what I call an unpresidented spelling error! :)


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## dharvatis (Jun 21, 2022)

Two prawns were swimming around in the sea one day. The first one was called Justin and the second one was called Kristian. They were continually being chased and threatened by the sharks that inhabited the area.

Eventually Justin had had enough. He said to Kristian, "I'm fed up with being a prawn. I wish I was a shark, and then I wouldn't have to worry about being eaten all the time."

As he said this, a large mysterious cod appeared and said, "Your wish is granted!" And believe it or not, with that Justin turned into a fearsome shark.
Kristian was horrified and so immediately swam away as he was scared of being eaten by his old friend.

As time went by, Justin found his new life as a shark to be boring and lonely. None of his old friends would let him get near them as they thought he would eat them and so they just swam away whenever he approached. It took a while, but eventually Justin realized that his new menacing appearance was the cause of his sad plight.

Then one day he was swimming all alone as usual when he saw the mysterious cod again. He thought it'd be better if he could go back to his old life so he swam to the cod and begged to be changed back. The cod worked his magic and suddenly Justin was a prawn once more.

With tears of joy streaming down his cheeks Justin swam straight to Kristian's home.
As he opened the coral gate, the happy memories came flooding back. He banged on the door and shouted, "Kristian, it's me, Justin, your old friend. Come out and see me again."

Kristian replied, "No way! You're a shark now and you'll just eat me. I'm not being tricked into being your dinner."
Justin shouted back "No, I'm not a shark any more. That was the old me. I've changed...
I've found Cod. I'm a prawn again Kristian."


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## nickel (Jun 21, 2022)

This proves that, if you draw out a pun, it does not become puny.


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## daeman (Oct 10, 2022)




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## nickel (Oct 15, 2022)

Δεν υπάρχει τίποτα πιο εκνευριστικό από τα λογοπαίγνια που βιάζουν την προφορά, ιδίως στα αγγλικά, αρχίζοντας με εκείνα που μπερδεύουν βραχέα με μακρά φωνήεντα (π.χ. να κάνεις λογοπαίγνιο με τα fit - feet). Το παρακάτω, που έπεσα άθελά μου επάνω του σήμερα στο Facebook, θα μείνει για λίγο καιρό στη δική μου κορυφή των πιο μισητών λογοπαιγνίων. Υποτίθεται ότι το "Pun in, 10 dead" θυμίζει το "Pun intended". Μόνο αν δεν ξέρεις να προφέρεις αγγλικά και να τονίζεις σωστά. Το ένα είναι «πάν ίν, τέν ντέντ» και το άλλο «πάν ιντέντιντ». Αν δεν μπορείτε να καταλάβετε τη διαφορά, μη δημοσιεύετε λογοπαίγνια. (Κυρίως εκνευρίστηκα γιατί δεινοπάθησα να το καταλάβω...)


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## SBE (Oct 15, 2022)

Δεν βλέπω πρόβλημα. Πριν από λίγο εβλεπα ενα ντοκιμαντέρ και οι άγγλοι ειδικοί μίλαγαν για μίθέιν, κι οι αμερικανοίο για μεθέιν. Μεθάνιο, για όποιον αναρωτιέται. Στο -ded θα κολλήσουμε;


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